


Swan Song

by ToxicLxrry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Best Friends, Flashbacks, M/M, Sad Ending, Sad Harry, Third Time's the Charm, Unrequited Love, one for the pain, two to forget
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-20
Updated: 2015-11-20
Packaged: 2018-05-02 13:03:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5249231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToxicLxrry/pseuds/ToxicLxrry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry revisits the places that mattered the most to him when he still had Louis</p>
            </blockquote>





	Swan Song

**Author's Note:**

> My first attempt to a Larry thing in quite a while, and my first time posting here 
> 
> Let me know what you think? 
> 
> Twitter: @radioactvepizza

_“I don’t think it would have been possible for me to realise just how much I missed you without coming there, to our place.”_

 

The young man slowly makes his way down the gravel path hidden behind the old hedge. His eyes are following the trail of small, smooth rocks on the ground in front of him and his hands are in his pockets, his whole body slouching. Were anyone to see him, a starry night like this one, it is not hard to believe that they would think that the man slowly disappearing out of sight is an old one, probably adding at least forty years to his actual age. But as it turns out, no one sees him and only the trees and bushes nearby knows that something bigger that the occasional stray crossing the path is heading down it, green eyes glossed over by tears that are yet to fall.

 

Had trees been able to whisper it is not unlikely that the small backyard, as abandoned as the old house hiding it from the rest of the world, had been filled with silent whispers, only audible to the man as the ruffle of leaves, as this is the first time someone visits the trees in a long time. Three years to be exact. But of course, trees cannot whisper if there is no wind to ruffle the leaves and if they do take notice on their visitor it is without even the slightest shiver. The man enters the backyard through a gap in the fence, seemingly unconcerned by the thorns tearing in his clothes and leaving scratches on his skin. He stops after taking a few steps closer to the middle of the backyard, his eyes now focused on a big oak tree on the other side of the open area. For a moment he thinks he sees someone, a short figure standing in the dark shadow of the tree gesturing for him to come closer, and then he blinks as the figure is gone. Slowly, with his breath held and what feels like a heavy stone in the pit of his stomach, he makes his way across the moonlit backyard, walking through knee high grass as he does so. As he touches the trunk of the large tree, memories hits him like a wave, high and unforgiving, hits the rocky shores near his hometown and he closes his eyes, remembering.

 

~

_“Come on then, hurry up!” The green-eyed man, with a smile on his face, willingly follows the shorter man in front of him, walking down the familiar path towards the opening in the otherwise thick hedge. The first time they came here the opening was no more than a small hole near the upper edge but that was months ago and their frequent use of said hole has turned it into a proper opening, wide enough for them to get through without having to squeeze through sideways. He watches his friend disappear through the opening, too short to be visible over the hedge, before following himself._

_When he gets to the other side, the other half of the pair is already halfway across the backyard, heading towards the oak. Smiling to himself, the taller man sets off in a sprint, quickly catching up with the shorter of the two and then passing him, running up to the tree and touching the trunk as if to win a race or a game they played as kids. He turns around, first now realising he’s been holding his breath, and smiles towards his best friend, still only three quarters of the way there._

_They are not carrying anything this time but more often than not they bring something, be it only a few cans of beer or a mars bar to split between the two. It’s nothing they ever talk about, nothing they decide ahead, but rather something that just happens. Sometimes they bring something from home, sometimes they stop on the way over, wordlessly heading to the nearest supermarket only to minutes later emerge again, carrying something either in their hands or in their pockets. But this time they brought nothing to eat or to drink and are carrying nothing but their phones in their pockets._

_“It’s colder tonight.” the statement comes out of nowhere, the shorter of the two now standing right next to him, looking up at the stars._

_“It is.” he agrees, and it really is colder. It’s not cold to the point where mittens and a hat might be needed, not even to where one might want to get a warmer jacket out from the closet, but it is colder. They have had a surprisingly good summer, considering where they live, and the cold is in a way shocking._

_“I think this might be the last time we comes here this year, summer is almost over.” that, how his friend seem to have read his mind, is not shocking. They have always been good at understanding each other with no words being spoken and that ability seem to have been gotten stronger over the last couple of months._

_“yeah,” he agrees. “time to go back to our normal lives.” and there must be something in his voice because the bright blue eyes leaves the stars to look at him instead and a small smile appears on the other’s face._

_“it’s not like we won’t ever see each other again, and I have an idea” the green eyes follows the smaller hands belonging to the other man as they reach down, searching for something in the grass. “I found this a few days ago, thought it might be worth keeping track on.” a rather large, slightly rusty nail is now being held in the small hand and he, once again, follows its movements as they step closer to the tree._

_“Ta-da! Now we won’t ever be forgotten, now this summer will be remembered forever” the man with the green eyes steps closer to the tree once more and a smile spreads across his face when he manages to make out what it is. Their names, carved into the bark on the tree, deep enough for it to stay there for years and years._

_“That’s…”_

_“amazing, I know. Now come on, let’s lay down.” and as they lay there, thighs and shoulders touching, drawing their own constellations in the stars, it doesn’t matter that the summer is nearly over or that this is their last night here. This summer, their late night adventures, have given the green-eyed man something he will forever cherish. It has made him realise that it is looking into the blue eyes he know so well that he feels the most at home. It has made him realise that he would walk through fire if the soft voice belonging to his best friend asked him to. He now knows what that strange feeling he gets every time he hears the melodic laugh is and it’s comforting in a way. He knows it probably won’t work out the way he wants it to, but at least he now knows that yes, he is in love._

 

~

The pub is packed, not surprising considering that it’s a Friday evening and that this is one of very few pubs in the area that serves decent food. But there is no food in front of the green eyed man, just a half empty glass of beer that has not been touched in close to an hour. The young man is staring at the bar in front of him without actually seeing it, still absorbed with memories of happier times. They used to come to this pub, just the two of them or with a few mates, and they would spend hours just laughing and talking before finally heading home, walking along the water to the shorter’s apartment complex.

 

But of course, nothing last forever. It has been months since he last came here with his friend, or with anyone for that matter. Lately no one has been here with him, leaving him alone with his thoughts. He has been spending a lot of time alone lately, ever since things started going downhill for him. And to think that he doesn’t actually know what happened, even though he has got a pretty good idea of what went down.

 

~

_Hearing the bell above the door to the pub chime, the young man turns his head to look at the people entering and his heart skips a beat as his eyes lock with the bright blue ones. It then sinks as the other man quickly looks away, mumbling something under his breath to the others. They look in the direction of the bar as well and then hesitate for a moment before heading over to the table near the corner of the room, their table. They take their jackets off and before long, one of them, a tall man with deep brown eyes, makes his way over to the bar. The green eyes follows the man who used to be his friend as he walks up and leans against the polished wood, ordering for himself and the other three at the table._

_“Listen mate.” he then says, turning to the one with green eyes. “please don’t come over there, it’ll only make things awkward for all of us. We just want a normal night out, no drama.”_

_“Yeah I understand.” the younger of the two says, just loud enough for the other to hear. “I won’t bother you.”_

_“Appreciate it man, thanks.” he gets a pat on the shoulder and then the other man turns to the bartender, who now has filled their glasses. “Oh and another thing” he then says, turning back around. “I really wish you hadn’t told anyone, things could have still been like they used to.”_

_“I do too.” but when he finds his voice again, whispering the three words, the other man is already back at their table, handing the others their drinks and laughing along with them._

_Watching his former friends and the one man who still makes his heart beat faster soon becomes too painful for the lonely young man and he orders three shots, his eyes focused on the bar once again._

_“Take one for the pain” he whispers to himself as he empties the first glass, feeling the familiar burn as the liquor runs down his throat to warm his stomach. “Two to forget” he then adds, downing the second one. The third one he takes for good measure, the saying goes “third time’s the charm” after all, and after that he stands, grabbing his coat and leaving the pub._

 

~

He had found out a few weeks after that time at the pub that his best friend had gotten married, married to someone he had never met. That had hurt more than being ignored, not only because he was madly in love but because that had proved that their friendship really had ended. And now, sitting on his bed in the small apartment he called home, he knows that that pain was the worst one he ever experienced, the worst he ever will experience. Weighing the pills in his hand he cannot help but wonder how things will be after he leaves, if they will miss him.

 

He grabs the glass of water standing on his bedside table, sorting the pills in three neat piles on the bed.

“Take one for the pain” he whispers, grabbing the first pile once again and swallowing them with the water. “two for the pain” he repeats the procedure with the second pile. “and three for good measure.” having swallowed the last few pills he lays down, staring at the ceiling for a little while before closing his eyes. And finally, the pain is gone.

 

_“As far as last words goes, I wouldn’t say that mine were particularly interesting. But if I could tell you anything, it would be that my last thought were of you.”_

 

 


End file.
